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Nice to e-meet you! That's internet for Hello. And that's also about as far as I got in planning what to say in this thing...but as a lover of spontaneity and the inability to edit my own words because that would mean actually having an awareness as to the nothingingness that I am about to ramble on about for far too long...I'm just going to go ahead and keep typing. Apparently...

I've Been Exposed

After years of going unnoticed, my deep dark secret has recently been publicly exposed.
Yes, it's true. I am 24 years old and I have never owned flip-flops. I can hear the gasps and cries from all of you screaming. 'THE HORROR'! I know, I know.

I wish I could give you a good excuse about how I was the victim of some horrible flip-flop stealing crime that took me years of therapy to recover from, or you know, something like that...but the truth is I've just never had any.

So it started while joining friends from school at the beach several days in a row. The first day I got off the hook as it was late and I had to walk a ways to get there so my ballerina flats were passed off as somewhat acceptable. But the next day when I showed up in mini-heeled sandles, I was not as lucky.

To me, my 'mini-heels' are the equivalent of flip-flops to everyone else, but to everyone else you'd think I just walked up in 7" knee-high hooker boots. It's as if people were actually insulted at my choice of footwear.

I think it probably had to do with the fact that I sunk into the sand with every step I took and flipped sand up everywhere as I drunkenly stumbled in the sand. Everyone laughed at my inability to get anywhere without looking ridiculous, but the stubborness in me refused to take them off.

It turned quickly from a joke to pure pity. I don't know if they all thought that I was too poor to buy myself $3 flip-flops (which doesn't make a whole lot of sense considering the shoes I showed up in were clearly a little more expensive), or if my mother banned my from wearing flip flops, or maybe I had a traumatizing flip flop incident as a child, but everyone yelled at me to get some asap and said that if I didn't they would.

I ignored them all and went back to the car where I held my heels close to my cheek and promised them that they were amazing shoes and not to listen to anything those crazy people said, assuring them that I would never leave them for some cheap brightly coloured can-barely-even-be-called shoes.

The next week in class as we went around doing 'check-in' Amer announced that she had a special gift that she would like to present to me. I think I was the only one in more shock than the teacher when she pulled out a pair of polka dot flip flops from her bag!

So you can all sleep at night knowing that I now own, and have actually worn, a pair of flip flops!

I promise to wear them next time I come to the beach, just don't tell my other shoes! :)


9 Responses so far.

  1. Amer says:

    Your welcome lover :) I just saved your life. And no they weren't $3...I would never spend that much on u haha

    ps: a post about my thoughtfulness and u choose a pic of audrey and u?!?! FAIL! Haha

  2. Hahahaha! I am not a fan of flip flops but I bought a pair last year :P they aren't that comfy to me but still...good for you!

  3. Ken says:

    if u lived near the beach, then u would have flip flops!

  4. Alex says:

    You know, there are plenty of flat sandals that are acceptable on the beach. If you want to look classy and be comfortable, a pair of Chacos or Keens are good. Then there are the traditional Tevas or Naot that are nice and slightly less money. Though flip-flops are never a bad choice when you go to the beach.

  5. Ally says:

    hahaha! I love it!
    I'm not too big on flip flops either, in aus we call them thongs.
    But I can no longer wear massive heels as the boyfriend is only 2 inch taller than me!!


  6. Sadako says:

    That's impressive! Is that the cosmetic equivalent of showing up with eyeliner on to to swimming? :D

  7. Janet says:

    haha I was like this for years..always wearing ballerina flats or other types of sandals. Then in Australia last year i bought a pair of flip flops and refuse to wear anything else now..they're so airy! :)

  8. Tyler says:

    I congratulate you for your stance on flip flops. I can't stand them. They are the footwear equivalent of going around in sweatpants all the time. They also make it impossible to make a quick getaway, if you need to, or do anything except produce an obnoxious noise as you walk.

  9. gucci uk says:

    reading your post and i do believe you are born to be a fashion blogger.

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