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Nice to e-meet you! That's internet for Hello. And that's also about as far as I got in planning what to say in this thing...but as a lover of spontaneity and the inability to edit my own words because that would mean actually having an awareness as to the nothingingness that I am about to ramble on about for far too long...I'm just going to go ahead and keep typing. Apparently...

I can't tell you what I learned from school but I could tell you a story or two...

Since I've been looking back at my nursing education, I have been reminded of some of my not so fine moments over the years, and thought why not share my embarrassing stories with you!

I had to cut the list short, as there have been many...but heres a few that stand out

1. This first one that has happened on numerous occasions. There have been (far too) many times that I've attempted to take a blood pressure on a patient only I accidentally put the cuff on inside-out so that as it's blowing up you can hear the velcro coming apart and then it embarrassingly just pops right off their arm. The patients always look up confused, which is when I say... 'oh, weird...that's never happened... must be a machine malfunction'. Then turn the cuff right way around and do it again.

2. Having a patient with dementia call a coworker in close and say in a terrified quite whisper 'There's something behind you". Only to have the coworker then turn around, slightly worried, and see that the only thing behind her was me, standing there smiling obliviously.

Patients with dementia are always interesting...another asked me if my mother was an alcoholic whore.

3. Working in the emergency room and walking straight through the closed curtains to see what was going on in the trauma room, and just as I do suddenly have a bunch of people all yell "X-RAY" at me. I naturally assumed that they were asking if I was the x-ray technician and so my obvious response was "No, I'm an ESN (student)" but what they were actually doing was warning me that they were taking an XRAY and I was stupidly standing there being exposed. Opps.

4. Doing a neurovital check on a patient, including checking there pupils for reactivity and reporting my findings to the nurse:

Me: "I tried several times, but I found the patients right pupil had no reaction to light...?"
Nurse: Well thats good.
Me: Why would that be good?
Nurse: Because it's a glass eye.


5. Looking at a patients dressing on their lower hip where I had to pull his pants down to be able to see it and as a joke he screamed 'RAPE!' 
Before I even had time to react, at least 3 nurses ran into the room to find me standing there like a deer in headlights pulling the mans pants down, eye level with his junk. 

6. Working in maternity and having a 17 year old patient in labor (and myself knowing nothing about labor) walking into the room mid-contraction, all cheery and upbeat and introducing myself... to which her response was "I DON'T CUSSING GIVE A CUSS WHO THE CUSS YOU ARE...ROARRRRALKSJARRJKASH..." The 'roarrralksjarrlkahs' may or may not have happened, along with the beady red eyes and explosion of smoke I saw from her spinning head.
However I have since learned not to interrupt a woman during contractions... 

I wish I could say that my embarrassing nursing moments are behind me, but I can assure you they are only just beginning...and I can no longer blame it on being 'just a student'. 

7 Responses so far.

  1. reading your post and i do believe you are born to be a fashion blogger.

  2. reading your post and i do believe you are born to be a fashion blogger.

  3. Hahahaha.

    That RAPE one sounds hilariously awesome!

    Aww, you'll be great. And if nothing else, it'll be great blog material!

  4. I seriously respect anyone who goes into nursing. In perhaps 5/6 of these situations, I would've ended up punching someone in the teeth. ;)

    Good luck and like r said, excellent blogging material!

    Lor

  5. TbR says:

    'It's a glass eye' made me laugh out loud. Seriously. I've missed you!

  6. "M" says:

    Haha! Number 5 is awesome.

  7. these styles on your post are totally my favorite,xoxo

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